No awkward conversations: OPAN’s ready to talk about sex in aged care

OPAN’s upcoming webinar Your Right to Intimacy presents an invaluable opportunity for aged care consumers to find out more about their rights, but as Celebrate Ageing’s Founder and Director Catherine Barrett told hello leaders, aged care providers and staff who tune in could discover a lot from the session as well. 

‘Stepping into the provider’s shoes, and for the front line staff in particular, it’s such a challenge for them because most have no training on sexual rights for older people. They don’t expect older people to be sexual and find themselves faced with the most complex problems,” Ms Barrett said.

“People ring me with problems and sometimes it’s mind-bogglingly profound and complex. So staff are putting out bushfires with garden hoses because they don’t have the education.

“It might be a resident violating the sexual rights of another resident, residents forming a new sexual intimate relationship or staff themselves having a sexual boundary crossed by a resident. We’re asking staff to manage complex situations with little education, skills and confidence. That’s not reasonable.”

Ms Barrett will be one of four panellists featured in the webinar on Tuesday, June 25. She is joined by Gwenda Darling, Member, National Older Persons Reference Group, OPAN; Shawnee van Poeteren, Senior Project Officer – Advocacy Practice, OPAN; and Rachael Brennan, PhD Student, The University of Queensland. 

OPAN’s CEO, Craig Gear, hosts the event and he echoed Ms Barrett’s thoughts about the complexity of the right to intimacy for older people. 

“How do we support an older person’s right to intimacy, including sexual intimacy, while simultaneously ensuring their safety? It’s a complex subject, which is why OPAN is encouraging conversation through our webinar and through our pioneering ReadyToListen project,” he explained. 

“One thing we know for sure, however, is that warmth, companionship and physical affection are vital to a person’s health and wellbeing – whether they are 18 or 80 and whether they live independently at home or in residential aged care.

“Respect for an older people’s sexuality and gender identity is also a crucial component of quality, person-centred aged care. I am aware of a number of cases in which older people have felt the need to go back in the closet after moving to residential care, triggering earlier trauma.”

Mr Gear said OPAN is confident the incoming Aged Care Act will strengthen the sexual and intimacy rights of older people. Meanwhile, Ms Barrett was quick to highlight their collaborative work on the ReadyToListen project. 

ReadyToListen features several impactful resources, including a Charter of Sexual Rights and Responsibilities in Residential Aged Care. This is an essential part of the process to both empower residents and protect them. 

“Why do we need these rights and responsibilities articulated? Because we have thought about older people as asexual and that’s not accurate. It’s not recognising older people as fully human and it’s ageist,” Ms Barrett said.

“The Charter clearly sets the benchmark and draws the line in the sand to say ‘These are the human rights of older people in relation to their sexuality’. Responsibilities are important to flag upfront if there are issues, too, and a provider can bring in families or residents to talk about situations when those responsibilities are being breached.”

The webinar will focus on both rights and responsibilities, including for older people who live with dementia or other cognitive impairments. Complex scenarios and the diverse ways in which older people can express their sexuality and gender will all be explored. 

While Ms Barrett was not ready to give away too much insight into the webinar, with providers and staff called upon to register, she did mention two recurring themes from her years of experience. 

One is the importance of conversation. She said staff, residents and family members can often overcome embarrassment or conflict simply by communicating with one another to understand the situation.

The other is for staff to take a united approach to sex and intimacy in aged care. If staff are not communicating with one another and they’re all sharing different approaches with residents, conflict and harm are likely to occur. But through clear communication and shared understanding, positive outcomes can be achieved.

“We had to take two steps back and talk about sexual rights. People talk about being sex-positive in the border community, so let’s have an approach to older people’s sexuality that isn’t ageist, that says older people have the right to intimacy,” she said.

“So often when we talk about sexuality people go straight to sex and think it’s just about sex. Yes, it’s about sex but not only that. “Intimacy, sex and sexual expression are incredibly important when people are experiencing a lot of loss. There’s comfort you can find in a partner from a hug or someone holding a hand.”

Click here for more information on the Your Right to Intimacy webinar.